21w1d Everything going well...

Wooooo! Over half way there! It has flow by but seems to be going to slow at the same time. I'm getting excited now! I went through some of Mason's old baby clothes last night and everything looks good. Cody took an inventory of baby items in the attic and things are seeming to come together. I got my breast pump the other day so that was good. I found a sit and stand stroller for $50 on craigslist so we'll about that. We still need car seats but that will come. Those will be a big investment.

So I think with this baby I am going to try something new. I think I'm going to wear my baby. I am looking into some fabric baby carriers. I'm going to purchase a ring sling as soon as I get the chance and I think I'm going to try a DIY stretchy wrap. I just need some good fabric for it. Fabric.com has a good sale on the right Fabric right now but wouldn't you figure, we're broke. hahah.

I'm in total nesting mode. Mom and I are supposed to get paint sometime soon and Cody and I are supposed to paint. I'm excited. I wouldn't mind things looking better around here. I just can't wait to get ready for him. We just don't have the money to go all out right now... ever.

My next OB appt is a week from today and Mr. Kaleb's anatomy scan is the following Monday. I can't wait to see him again! It will have been 6 weeks by then that I haven't had an ultrasound.

So far we have some scares. I keep hearing decels in his heart rate with the doppler. None of the Dr.'s seem to care and think I'm being paranoid. Maybe I am but I KNOW my baby's heartbeat. I've been listening to it since it has even been POSSIBLE to listen to it! 'sigh'. He goes through period of lots of movement and no movement. The no movement periods scare me to death. I was in L&D at 20 weeks not feeling movement. Wouldn't you figure as soon as the put the monitors on my belly, he was moving all over the place. I'm NOT complaining though. I LOVE my littlest man move!

19 weeks OB appt

Well I had a regular OB appt today. Baby is doing great. Heart rate was 151 and my uterus is measuring just a little bit ahead. Hooray! Now I have to start making a birth plan to go over with him in the next couple of visits. I really feel like we're getting down to the nitty gritty planning now. I'm getting excited/nervous!

This morning I was laying on the couch and baby boy was laying on my left side. They way he was laying was uncomfortable for me so I poked him a little bit and and got this HUGE kick and roll. It was so big I actually felt it on the OUTSIDE! That's the first I have been able to feel him move from the outside. Of course I've tried to get him to move that big again and nothing. Just his usual small movements. I guess I just really ticked him off this morning. haha!

As for the rest of my life. Cody and I are still not doing well. I think I've come to terms with that this divorce is going to happen. I've made some phone calls and we can't get a divorce until 60 days after the baby is born. We also have to be "separated" for 60 days as well. It still just breaks my heart and makes me so angry that he is doing this. I wanted my kids to grow up in a "normal" family. I'm so scared this will a lasting impression on Mason and this baby won't even get to experience a normal family. There are so many people who love both these kids so I hope that will make up for something but it's still just devastating. I just know that my main purpose in life is to be the best I can to both of my boys. With Family, Friends, and God, I know I can do it!